Arriving to the Land of Milk and Honey
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This article is for any guy that plans to bring his foreign bride,
Asian bride, Latin bride, Mexican bride, Columbian bride or lover
to his country to start a family.  In most cases you can have a
successful marriage if you start out on the right foot. Like many
guys, I thought the Asian lady of my dreams would automatically
be happy living in the USA, and I was only worried about the
process of bringing her here.  I am speaking of the immigration
hell that you go through before your foreign bride can step foot
in your country.  Getting the lady here is only half the process,
and you should not underestimate the adjustment period she will
go through after arriving to live with you.

Put yourself in her shoes.  Your bride has left her family, friends,
job and everything she has ever known and flown half way
across the world to a place she has never been before.  Her
favorite foods are gone.  She has no network of friends.  Your
bride has resigned to not seeing her family again for years.
People do not speak her native tongue.  She doesn't know where anything is.  She doesn't understand the culture.  The
list goes on and on.  There is only one thing this foreign lady has as a safety net, and that is you my friend.  You can
either help and support your bride, or you can be a jerk and expect her to just deal with it.  If you choose option number
two chances are your marriage will end in disaster and you will have no one to blame but yourself.  If you cannot support
her during this adjustment period, then do yourself a favor and abandon the process before it is too late.  
The first thing I did was talk to my family before my Asian bride arrived.  It was not a shock that she was coming because
my parents were already aware of the fact that I had been to the Philippines and gotten married.  I just wanted to make
sure they were open to accepting her into the family.  There was no typical courtship leading up to our marriage,
because it was not possible to bring her to the house so everyone could get to know her.  As I suspected, my family was
more than willing to accept my wife unconditionally.  This is a very important peace of the puzzle when building a
successful relationship no matter were your bride is from.
The second thing I did is look for Filipino people in the community.  Through friends and family I was able to locate some
ladies from my wife's country and even talked with them before she arrived.  Many of them were open to meeting my wife,
and in fact she has maintained a friendship to some of these ladies 7 years after she arrived in the U.S.A.  Again, this
was very important in my new bride's adjust to life in the states.  These people not only accepted my wife, they also
showed her places to go that sold her favorite foods and phone cards to call home.
I think the most important thing to remember is do not ever poke fun of your wife or belittle her because she does not
understand certain customs or technology in your country.  I have seen a few friends and acquaintances make this
mistake and there is just no reason for it.  Your new bride will become resentful of you for doing this even though she
might not tell you.  A know one guy that came very close to losing his wife and new child because he had a bad habit of
making fun of his wife in front of others.  He has since seen the light and changed his ways.  He thought it was harmless
joking around but his Asian wife saw it has him being disrespectful.  He was being disrespectful and knows this now.

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